好山好水慢慢走

安安最近學唱紅樓夢中賈寶玉的招牌歌「紅豆詞」，學得興緻勃勃；一下子說要唱給她的美國小朋友聽，一下子又和我討取英文翻譯。我到網上去查詢，發現最主要的譯文有兩種版本。其一為中國翻譯家楊憲益、戴乃迭夫婦所譯：

Like drops of blood fall endless tears of longing

By painted pavilion grow willows and flowers untold

Sleepless at night when wind and rain lash gauze windows

can't forget the sorrows new and old

Choking on rice like jade and wine like gold

turns from the wan reflection in the glass

Nothing can smooth away the frown

It seems that the long night will never pass

Like the shadow of peaks we can always see

Like the green stream it flows for ever on

另一個版本為英國漢學家David Hawkes 所譯：

Still weeping tears of blood about our separation:

Little red love-beans of my desolation.

Still blooming flowers I see outside my window growing.

Still awake in the dark I hear the wind a-blowing.

Still oh still I can’t forget those old hopes and fears.

Still can’t swallow food and drink, ‘cos I’m choked with tears.

Mirror, mirror on the wall, tell me it’s not true:

Do I look so thin and pale, do I look so blue?

Mirror, mirror, this long night how shall I get through?

Oh—oh—oh!

Blue as the mist upon the distant mountains,

Blue as the water in the ever-flowing fountains.

兩家的翻譯（尤其是Hawkes 版本）都有顧到譯詩的節奏和押韻，不過並無法做到像原文般一韻到底。「紅豆詞」的另一個特色，是每句開頭時的排比手法：「滴不盡」、「開不完」、「睡不穩」、「忘不了」、「嚥不下」、「照不盡」、「展不開」、「捱不明」、「遮不住」、「流不斷」，連用十種不同的否定詞來表達無盡的愁悵之情，意境極美。楊憲益版本在這方面採用略而不譯的做法，而Hawkes則在每句的開頭運用相同的Still一字營造排比效果，但是做到一半（五句）就停止了。

我想到自已在多年以前，也曾一時興起翻譯過這首詩。那時我試著用英語中眾多以 -less結尾的字表達詩中的排比手法，感覺上效果還不算太差，遂在此寫出來做個紀錄，供有興趣者參考。不過英文畢竟是我的第二語言，對音步、音節和韻腳的感覺不如中文敏銳，無法像上面這些專業翻譯家般寫成英詩的格式，僅能用散文方式呈現了：

Endless tears of lovesickness trickling down like blood-red beans,

Endless blossoming of spring flowers and willow,

Restless nights amid window-lashing wind and rain,

Timeless memories of new and old sorrow.

Tasteless, hard-to-swallow delicacies choking in the throat,

Countless haggard expressions in the flowered mirror.

Joyless frowning eyebrows,

Endless clock-ticking nights,

Oh!

Just like my useless efforts to block those blue mountains from the view,

and those endless green rivers which just keep on flowing.

中文詩中有不少特有的意象，並沒有精簡傳神的英文詞語可以對應，是譯者一個相當頭痛的問題。楊憲益和Hawkes兩位譯者，可能是因為英詩格式的限制，只好把一些獨特的意象跳過不譯。英國譯者尤其精簡得厲害，除了「紅豆」因為是主要意象，多加一句翻譯出來之外（楊譯倒是省掉了），其他像「春柳」、「畫樓」、「紗窗」、「菱花」、「更漏」之類難搞的詞語，就一概省略了。這些詞真的很不好譯，例如「畫樓」是雕飾精美的樓房，楊憲益譯成painted pavilion，給人涼亭的感覺，不知道是否正確﹖我在頭痛之餘，也乾脆把它跳過了。反正我只是做著玩的業餘愛好者，不必太認真啦，不喜者就裝沒看到好了。